17 Weeks

Yay....17 weeks! I'm so excited. I'm getting a little bigger. Last Friday, I woke up and was like "Hey, where did that come from!" I had a little baby bump :) Also, the nausea is gone...for now anyway but I really think it is not coming back! Even though I am tired often, things just seem to be getting better. I don't just come home and lay on the coach all night. I seem to have more energy and all I can say is "FINALLY!" Now, we will just have to see how long this newfound energy lasts but I'm hoping at least until the third trimester.

Addison is doing great. This kid just gets smarter and smarter each day. She is so funny and says and does some of the most hysterical things. She is seriously awesome! Everyday she comes up to my belly and rubs and kisses it. She knows there is a baby in there. I can't wait until she can feel the baby kick.

So that is it for now. I just hoping to have a wonderful weekend. My cousin is coming into town to go to Bite of Las Vegas. This means lots of eating on Saturday. Thank god I'm prego! It's my excuse to eat some more :)

It's a Girl

Yup...it's a Girl alright. See for yourself.

Even though I told myself I wasn't going to be upset, I am. I hate it too. I just really, really, REALLY wanted a boy. I have been so sick lately especially last weekend. The whole time I kept telling myself it will all be worth it if its a boy. And now its not...and I am upset. Not that I am not happy for a girl but damn, I really wanted a boy.

Part of me is even more upset with the thought that I may have to get prego again to try one more time for a boy. And that sure makes me upset with the thought that I may have to go through this sickness one more time. I'm not up for that.

I told a girl at work today too and started crying again. Geez. I just need to remind myself that as long as the baby is healthy...that is all that matters. And don't get me wrong...I am happy. I really am. Think of all the money I am going to save with another girl :) I just wanted the little boy experience.

But, as long as she is healthy, I will forever be happy and grateful. Now, if only she would stop making me sick all the time. I seriously was so nauseous last night and thought I was going to throw up two times. I am so done with the sickness. At 15 and a half weeks, you would think it would be over. Nope. Still in full swing. I just need to remind myself to stay positive and the sickness will pass...eventually.

Now, if only Donnie and I could agree on some names. My names include: Olivia, Stella, Emma. Donnie's name include ...... Nothing. He hasn't thought of anything yet he doesn't like mine. Let the arguing (I mean compromising) begin!

13.5 Weeks and Counting

Yea....Second Trimester! Hopefully this means the morning sickness, nausea and vomiting are over, right? Well, I'm not getting my hopes up just quite yet. I start to feel better and then it hits me all over again. I feel I am in a way better place to do this....even with the occasional throwing up fit, I feel way better than I did 3-4 weeks ago.

I went to the doc yesterday. It is always nerve racking the first few trips to the doctor. I am always concerned that since I can't feel the baby move yet that I had a miscarriage or something is wrong. I just feel like I am on pins and needles until I can hear that heartbeat. It is just music to my ears.

My doc appt was at 3:35. At 4:55, they took us back to the room. The whole time I am thinking "Wow...that was fast. We just might get out of here in good time today." Well...nope. We sat back in the room for over an hour! I was getting a little restless and I know Donnie was too. When the doc came in he acknowledged that we had been waiting a long time to see him. (yes we did!). We said, "Well good news then...it just might be too early for this thing (and he held up the doppler machine) so lets put you on the ultrasound machine!" I was so excited and felt like all the waiting was WELL WORTH IT! Now we get the see the baby which is way better than just hearing the heartbeat.

Baby looked really good. My doctor is always great because he takes the time to point out everything you can make out on the ultrasound machine...eye socket, brain, fist, fingers, thigh bone, arm, foot. It was great. And we got so excited just seeing an arm move. No sign of a gender yet....but we go to the special ultrasound place in a week and a half. I pray that we can find out then! Fingers crossed...

All-in-all, it was a very very successful doctor trip. I got a little bad news at the end...I can't lift Addison for 4-6 weeks after my C-Section. So how the hell am I going to get her out of her crib in the AM and back in there for naptime all by myself. Glad I found this out now...because I need to do some planning.

Sick of being Sick

I think I hit rock bottom over the long weekend. I seriously was sick every day throwing up. I lost over 5 lbs in 3 days.

I hit my breaking point last night. It was about 11 PM and I got up to brush my teeth. I suddenly felt so sick and starting throwing up real bad. After this finished, I was so upset. I am just so frustrated at being sick and feeling like I have no energy to pick myself off the couch to do anything. I started crying...hysterically. I was feeling so sorry for myself and what I was going through. Its not like I'm the only one that has ever had morning sickness, but I just feel like it is never going to end. Then, I feel like saying the words..."I don't want to do this anymore." But I don't because I know this will pass.

I think what I struggle with is that I wasn't ready to get pregnant. I didn't prepare myself for what I would be feeling and it kinda happened suddenly for me. I've been sick for over 5 weeks now and I'm just over it. I'm over the nausea and throwing up and lack of energy. I want to just hide in my house and sleep all day.

And to top it off...my vacation starts in 4 days. If I have another repeat weekend this weekend, I will be so upset. I am just praying all goes well and we have a great time. Me being sick all the time will just ruin it.

Eight Weeks

I was actually 8 weeks on Saturday.

Feeling: Terrible, miserable, nauseated. I throw up about everyday. My worst enemy is stairs - I seriously get so sick every time I walk up the stairs.

Weight: I'm down about 4-5 lbs. Most likely...its from the lack of eating and throwing up constantly.

I feel so sick I seriously just can't write anymore. This feeling sucks.

Talking and Peeing.

Addison has developed quite the vocabulary. She LOVES to repeat anything and everything you say. So far, though, no bad words. I don't know how that is possible since I can cuss like a sailor, but so far, so good. I was afraid early on that she wasn't talking as much as I thought she should be, but that for sure turned around. It is amazing at all the things she does say. She also knows pretty much every body part, five animals and their sounds, and we are working on colors and the numbers 1-5. My grandma watches her 2-3 times a week and during at least 2 of those times, they have "school time." My grandma will practice either the ABCs, numbers or colors with her. Am I lucky or what?

We also just got her the first DVD of Your Baby Can Read. I have been eying the infomercial since she was born and I would watch it at her 2 AM feeding. When I looked at the price, I was shocked...over $200. At the time, it just didn't work in our budget. Well, this weekend, I was grocery shopping at Wal-mart and since Wal-mart carries EVERYTHING, they just so happened to have it. You could buy it in individual volumes or 3 volumes for $69. Since I wasn't sure how Addison would take it, I thought I would only invest the $25 for one volume right now. I was surprised at how fast the DVD moves. The words are shown very fast - even fast for me and I know the words. But, it seems to keep her interest and she follows along for most of the movie. She actually gets very excited when she watches it and it always smiling at the other kids or laughing at what they are asking her to do. Some of the words are: clap, hi, baby, dog, cat, elephant, arms, arms up, mouth, nose, etc. So nothing too difficult and a good start to some words. The DVD is only about 15-20 minutes long which is good. I plan on having her watch it at least once a day and I don't want to move onto the next volume until we have mastered this one first.

Another new development in our house is the potty. Addison has peed on the potty 3 times now. In addition, we have spent many more hours sitting on the potty with no action. The other night we sat on the potty for over 20 minutes talking and playing but nothing. She even screamed for Donnie to come into the bathroom and sit down with us (I was sitting on the floor next to her). Sometimes, I think she just wants to sit on the potty because she loves to be naked.

Naked - my kid loves to be naked. Her new thing is to take her clothes off during nap time including her diaper. We go into her room to either check on her or get her up and she is butt naked. Surprisingly though, after she takes her diaper off, she never pees in her bed. This just further explains how ready she is to potty train. Sometimes she just insists on not wearing a diaper. It kills me too because I know she wants panties on but I can't risk her peeing her panties when we are out in public. It would just be a mess.

Panties - I need to have a talk with these manufacturers....not every kid that is ready for panties wears a size 2T. My kid is still in 12 months but we have searched and searched and searched for panties and the smallest size we could find is 2T. My kid weighs 21 lbs even and most of these panties start around 28 lbs. At her rate, she won't be reaching 28 until well after she is 2. I'm going to have to get creative with a needle and thread to sew these panties smaller. If not, she will be severely sagging.

Weight - as I said before, she weighs a whopping 21 lbs...hooray! The doctor said even though she is on the growth chart around the 2 percentile, she looks great. We only need her to gain 4 lbs between her first and second birthday and we are already half way there. Finding clothes to fit her is sometimes a challenge though. Any shorts that I buy her are usually 9 months and we still have to wear a belt because they are too big. Length is our only problem. She is such a peanut!

All-in-all, she is progressing great. I really couldn't ask for a better kid. We may have our moments and melt downs from time-to-time, but she really is a great kid. She is so smart and getting smarter everyday. I can't wait to see what comes next. I thought I missed her newborn and baby stage...but this is WAY better.

Morning Sickness

I am just sick of it. I swear I just want to cry everyday, all day. I am so sick. I can't keep anything down and I feel like absolute shit. I am tired and just want to sleep all day. But, unfortunately, I don't have that luxury. I have a full time job that I must go to if I want to pay my mortgage. It just sucks feeling this way. I feel like all day I have to way whether I need to start running to the bathroom and pray that I make it in time. Plus, I most people at work don't know so I just pray that when I do hit the bathroom that I am alone. So far so good. Good part though is the flu is going around at work and they might just think I got it.

I have contemplated when I should announce the pregnancy. After I told my boss, I honestly was okay with whoever knew. However, yesterday I found out so pretty scary news. Another girl at work was prego (about 1.5 weeks before me) and she lost the baby. It isn't even me and I wanted to start crying. I pulled my boss aside and triple checked that he wouldn't say anything about my baby bump during our company meeting because I knew it would be devastating. He didn't obviously and I am so glad I made sure to confirm it with him.

Losing the baby is of course my worst fear. I felt okay for one morning/afternoon and I started freaking out thinking that maybe I was feeling better because I too wasn't prego anymore. I honestly just can't think like that. If it happens, it happens but I can just hope for the best that my baby is okay. I really feel for what my coworker has to go through and I'm sure that it can't be easy.

I hope this morning sickness doesn't last much longer. I truly hate it (who doesn't?). I'm really looking forward to August 30th so I can hear the baby's heartbeat again. I pray that everything is alright in there.